I´ve played a couple of hundred hours of EU4 and things are getting kind of boring now. I´ve kept on using the same efficient tactics and strategies and playing a country for several centuries is bound to end up in massive blobbing, at which point I abandon the game as the AI really is no match for me then.
I´m not really interested in going full "bug abuse" mode to chase historically unrealistic achievements either. I just want historically realistic fights between almost dysfunctionally fragile states.
So I made this ruleset:
You start as a random country in Eurasia or Africa with less than 50 development.(just click random until you get one that fits the rules)
Voluntary ironman, because we need the ability to swap countries.
You get to play for 20 years before you have to change your country.
The first time you gain any new land, the timer restarts at 30 years, so theorethically you can play a total of 50 years as the same country.
Changing countries:
When your time is up, you save the game.
You take the total development of the country at the end of your rule, for example your country A had 50 development. Your new state has to be within 33% of your development, so between 34 and 66.
Your new state cannot be the rival or ally of your last state. Also it you must not have played that state before in this game.
You then pick the country closest to your former country that fits those limitations. You pick Country B.
Then you repeat that and pick another country closest to Country B that still fits to the limitations set by country A. You pick country C. Country C is your new country.
The primary goal is to use the time you have to give your country the best chance to thrive during the whole game while playing larger and larger countries as time goes on.
(the secret goal is to enjoy how your past countries get ruined by stupid AI or in some rare cases go nuts and dominate the neighbourhood thanks to YOUR good decisions and investments)
I did one playthrough already, starting as Toggourt and going through Papal states, Bohemia, France, Morocco, Yemen, Xi and eventually Spain. Spain with it's world-spanning colonial empire(1500+ dev) was too much work and I stopped there in 1750 or so. Had loads of fun but I didn´t document any of it so thought I´d make a new playthrough and take some notes this time to share it to the crowd.
AAR: EU4 for people with ADHD
It was 1444 and I pressed random:
Are we still on earth?
What kind of country are we really looking at here?
This is actually pretty well developed for some subarctic woods in the middle of nowhere.
First impression - this is good. Force limit 12 is nothing to scoff at and I know that this corner of the world tends to get very volatile early on and I might be able to gobble up all the lands Northeast of Ming and Mongols here if I play well, netting me an easy 150-200 development. I have far more chance to be aggressive here than in Europe or the Middle East as Ming and Mongols have rivals elsewhere and there is some buffer between me and Korea.
First impression plan: Get 1-2 decent alliances with either Ming, Mongols or Korea, borrow myself to oblivion and crush all the petty neighbours one by one.
Let's go! I immediately build up to force limit, improve relations with Ming, Mongols and Korea.
2 months in: all my neighbours have allied each other and none of them wants to ally with me.
4 months in: noone still wants to ally with me: Ming, Korea and Mongols wouldnt ally me even with 100 relation Imp. Every country around me has rivaled me. This is getting scary.
5 months in: The orange blob next to me invades Nivkh, it's northern neighbour. I am relieved, as now there is at least one neighbour who cannot afford a war with me.
https://preview.redd.it/fv8o3rubh6c41.png?width=2560&format=png&auto=webp&s=04f637af5c16f79ef2643fc1488ef99635f07e30
6 months in: Yeren declares war on me, none of it's allies join him. Sweet. I crush his unprepared armies and send 10 regiments to the dumpster and start sieging his stuff.
8 months in: Jianzhou declares war on me, Haixi and Korchin join them - totaling 36 regiments + a few that Yeren managed to save. NEW PLAN: Survive! I ask the orange dude in the east for access and try to deal with those 36k piecemeal. I manage to destroy some 5 stray regiments but after a couple of months they have me cornered in Nivkh, rout me to my capital where I get annihilated.
13 months in: I have no army and all my regions are occupied. I let Yeren take 2 regions in peace negotiations.
14 months in: Jianzhou and friends finally send me a peace deal. They want 2 regions to Haixi and me to borrow myself to limit to pay to Jianzhou. I don't see a better deal coming and go with it.
Some woodlands have changed hands yet I stay positive.
15 months in: I now have lost 69% of my development and have 13 left. I am at debt limit and unable to pay them off before 10 years. I decide to put all my dip and adm monarch points into development as I need the money more. Mil is reserved for tech.
I am now too small to be my neighbours' rival and Korchin pities me and I can make an alliance with them. I start paying off debts and after 3 years I believe I have paid enough to be able to afford an army. I build up to my force limit of 8.
13 years in: I have a comfortable 35 development now, almost where I was at start. I also have miltech 4 and a strong ally, I can still come back.
14 years in: Dongwhatever, that orange splot on my East, invades me. Me and Korchin manage to beat him up and start sieging his forts(Nivh is his vassal).
15 years in: We're almost done with Dongwhatever when Oirat(with Mongolia as vassal) declares war on Korchin. I feel that since Korchin was the only country to ally me in 15 years, I can't turn my back now. 40 regiments of ponies and mustaches ignore Korchin lands and go straight for our armies, bleh. No one gives me access and soon enough our armies are trapped and annihilated.
16 years in: Oirat is busy occupying Korchin lands and Dongwhatever gets to have revenge on me and occupies everything. I lose another region + 80 gold and only have my capital left now. Luckily the Oirats don't want anything from me.
17 years in: I now have 1 region with 19 development and about 4 times my limit in debt. Interest makes up 80% of my income. Korchin is still my ally, but they have 2 regions and are deep in dept, waiting to be swarmed by ponies. My only rival is Dongchin.
18 years in: New plan is to survive until 20 years have passed so I can find another country to screw up.
19 years in: Truce with Dongwhatever is over. I finally have enough money to recruit my first regiment. Dongwhatever leaks plans to invade me. I just hope not to get annexed before 20 years are out.
https://preview.redd.it/m4us2lf7i6c41.png?width=2560&format=png&auto=webp&s=bad5d750af24c3e4ddb9cb9d7d014a4975c03737
20 years in: I train my 2. regiment. I get an event giving me 20% siege defense - this is probably more useful than another 5 regiments! Dongwhatever finally attacks, wipes out my 2 regiments in a day and sieges my only city. The siege is at 0% when the bell rings and I can abandon this sad excuse for a country. 22 development, 20 less than I started with.
Well at least I wasnt wrong about the potential of the region. Those are some fine blobs.
The new country has to be between 15 and 29 development, not a rival nor an ally and can't be a country I have already played as. Jiangzhou is close and has been heavily shafted by Korea, leaving them with 18 development. So first jump is to Jingzhou. Next up, I can see Korchin, Ainu and Solon, but they all have lower than 15 development. Off to Japan it is! There I find a Daimyo named Shoni the closest to Jiangzhou. 19 development? Perfect.
Playing as Lord Shoni, a Japanese Daimyo
First impression: All but one neighbour is stronger than me. It's gonna be Udege all over again.
First plan: Survive!
My brother has more samurai, grain and gold than your brother.
After getting into a bit more detail I find Shoni's position really good actually. Shoni has the biggest bully on the block as it's ally and while the rest of the guys are stronger than me, they are stronger only very slightly and with a bit of manouvering I could beat them all 1v1.
I think it's quite possible to get to 80 development here in 30 years no problem. I have full manpower and 100 ducats in the bank. Ruler is an okay 1/5/3.
I start out by researching lvl 4 mil and adm techs and wowing to put the rest of adm and dip points into development again for the money. I demolish the fort and consider sinking the fleet, but I'm gonna hold onto the fleet for a little bit as I haven't played any Japanese countries in EU4 so far so am not quite clear how reliably I can strait hop without ships here.
1 year: Kikuchi has mere 4 regiments and no allies. I recruit to 8 regiments(5 force limit) and invade Kikuchi.
2 year: 1466 2. October I gained my first province, so I will be playing as Shoni until 1496 2. october. Kikuchi falls and I am now at 43 development, 6 force limit and no loans. I will spend 5 years or so consolidating my gains and then look for furter targets.
Blobbing as a national pastime.
6 year: At start I was allied with So, the little island between Japan and Korea. By this time the truce was over and I invaded.
8 year: So finally fell and my Daimyo grows! I developed my economy a bit and am now at a respectable 76 development, 10 force limit and mil tech 6. I'm not gonna go for mil tech 7 as it only gives arty bonuses which is not really cost-effective at this stage, all monarch points left over from coring and stability go into development - at least I get renaissance fast. I made 3 alliances with 3 other Daimyos, looking out that they dont rival each other. Together we should crush Yamana(86 dev, 12 force limit) easily after which I might just be able to gobble up all of Japan. My ambitions went from "Survive!" to "All of Japan" in 8 years. Nice.
13 year: Yamana attacks my allies while I still have a truce with Yamana so my allies cannot ask me for help and ruin my expansion. Just as planned.
14 year: The truce expires and I have 11 combat ships and 12 regiments against Yamana's 9 regiments and 6 combat ships, which are engaged far to the East against my allies. I invade. I also just got renaissance in my merchant guild owned province. I evict the merchants because they already had 101% influence from the development I poured into their "superport". (from 85 loyalty to 50 loyalty and 50 influence, man I got off easy on that one) I'm swimming in cash and have actually raised my FL to 12 through all that development. Life is good.
Top ten anime betrayals
15 year: I'm 25 years old already and still don't have an heir. The other Lords are mocking me. Today a ragged fellow walked up to the gates and asked to see me. He claimed he was a long-lost son of Shoni family, kidnapped by our enemies a decade ago and he finally managed to escape and return home. I now have a smart heir (5/4/5) with a strong claim.
16 year: My heir got sick and died. Luckily my genitalia started functioning overnight and I fathered a 5/4/3 son on the next day. You win some, you lose some. In the mean time I have occupied Yamana and am figuring out a good peace deal. This is what I end up with: 162 development, FL 14 and renaissance embraced by 1482. There's plenty of lands for future wars still left but my truce with Yamana will last longer than I have left with Shoni. The AI is gonna have to pick up from there and I'm sure she's gonna do a great job with the strong, rich and well-connected country I leave her.
Finally found use for the navy to force the straits open. Good thing I didn´t disband them.
17 year: Consolidating power, paying back debts, catching up on researching tech, observing how everyone else is doing. India is just a mess, Ayutthaya is in the phase of rapid expansion(followed by sudden implosion), Oirat has gone Genghis on all the nomads and our favourite explosive substance: Ming has already detonated and is in the process of developing severe schizophrenia. Asia looks ripening just right for my next country-jump.
This is fine.
25 year: The Shogun Ashikaga declared war on weakened Yamana. I naively helped, thinking I could get a couple of fat provinces with my 70% war participation. NEVER TRUST YOUR BOSS! I didnt get a single province and all the Yamana goodies near me were annexed to Ashikaga. Burning with anger, I did a little research and saw that all my buddies would join me in a little gang-up on Ashikaga. So I thought to wait just a little bit for Ashikaga to weaken itself by wrestling rebels and then go for the throne. My own rebels are at 60% and calming down so I'm ready to go soon.
27 year: My allies have some rebel troubles and a little war so I have to postpone the invasion. Also some of Ashikaga's rebels spill over and I have my hands full for a couple of months, the war for Shogunate will be totally left to the AI.
I honestly didnt expect to do so well after the \"Udege disaster\".
In 27 years I managed to grow from a tiny backwater into the strongest power in Japan, with roughly half of all Japanese troops and income wihle holding 1/3 of all land. Honestly I'm kinda tired of Japan by now and am really looking forward to getting back on the continent.
165 development, so my range of choice is 111 to 220. Me being a Daimyo I can rival only other Daimyos and they suck, so no decent rivals. Ashikaga has 105, so they are out(thank god!). Korea has 265, so they are out as well and next up is Haixi with 211 just barely in there. Haixi is my first jump.
\"Where are we going next, Lord Shoni?\"
All the Chinese bits and pieces are either too small by just a few development points. Oirats are way too strong. Eventually it's a contest between the remote Uzbek, Pegu and Bengal, all of them half a continent away from me. Using my extremely precise method of judging distances by putting my spread fingers on the screen, I manage to make sure with a 95% certainty that Pegu is closest to Haixi. It's time to violently spread Buddhism and eat bubblegum, and I´m all out of gum!
I'm going to keep on playing and upload the rest of the AAR during this week.
If there is a mod that already does something similar, then please let me know.
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